Titan Fortess 2 - Meet Them All
by Kammachon
Summary: Inspired by Titan Fortress 2 by Fil101 in Devianart, so I decided to make parody fanfic about it. This is my first fanfic and I hope you will like it. If you don't know Team Fortress 2 or Shinkegi no Kyojin, you won't get jokes. Rated M for violence and adult language. Please review! Thank you! The cover picture is belonged to Fil101 not me.
1. Meet Jean Kirchtein the Soldier

**Meet Jean Kirchtein the Soldier**

Pyro laughed when he was burning everything down with his flamethrower , but when he lifted his weapon up and screamed boastfully, a rocket came from nowhere and blew Pyro into little pieces...

Demoman was drinking his bottle of alcohol when a rocket suddenly blew him up...

" _Pow!_ " Heavy said, imagining that his hand was a gun as he thought he was a cowboy, but another rocket blew him up as well...

Then next, Jean was seen wearing a soldier's green helmet in front of something that seemed to be line of new recruit rookies wearing the same helmets but their color was blue...

"If fighting is sure to result in victory, then we must fight!" Jean said, then he turned around to one of the new recruits. "Keith Shadis said that, and I'd say he knows a little more about fighting than you do, pal, _because he invented it!_ " he said while he was toughing that new recruit's helmet. "And then he perfected it, so that no living man could best him in the ring of honor!"

In next clip we see Jean was screaming madly and charging himself into the battlefield, shooting Blu team along the way with his shotgun. An explosion exploded behind him as he keep running on the way, then he changed his weapon into rocket launcher. "To the left!" Marco yelled at Jean as Medic came into the scene to try to shoot him with syringe gun...

" _Maggot!_ " Jean shouted as he fired his rocket launcher and it blew Medic into little pieces. "Right up! Right up!" Mikasa shouted, "Go, go, go!" Sasha shouted. Jean led his team, accompanied by Mikasa and Sasha into the battlefield that their team were fighting with Blu team...

Back with the new recruits, Jean was continuing with his speech as he held grenades, one in each hand. "Then he used his fight money to buy two of every animal on earth, and then he herded them onto the boat, and then he beat the crap out of every single one!" Jean banged the two grenades together repeatedly.

The next clip showed Jean was still running through the battlefield. "Sentry up there!" Eren shouted as he stayed behind the cover with Marco but Jean didn't care. He reached Engineer and his sentry gun and blew them both up with another rocket, it made him fly and now he was running on a huge pipe. The final capture point were protected by Heavy and Pyro, so Jean blew them up by firing another rocket before landing. After he landed, Spy emerged behind him trying to stab him in the back, but Jean quickly turned around and hit him in the face with the shovel, knocking Spy out...

Back with the recruits, Jean laughed quietly as he remembered everything, but suddenly his face became serious again. "And from that day forward any time a bunch of animals are together in one place it's called a zoo!" Jean said while putting his face right in front of one of the new recruits. However, it turned out that they weren't new recruits at all but it was several heads of all Blu team members put on the fence, and Medic's head fell to the ground...

Jean crouched down, put his face near Medic's face and said " Unless it's farm!"

* * *

 **This is parody fanfic that inspired by Titan Fortress 2 by Fil101 in Deviantart. So please review if you don't like something in this fanfic and want me to fix it.**

 **Shingeki no Kyojin including characted belonged to Hajime Isayama.**

 **Team Fortress 2 including character and items belonged to Valve Coporation.**

 **Also, I will give credit to Fil101 for inspired me to write this fanfic.**

 **Thank you and hope you like it!**


	2. Meet Eren Jaeger the Scout

**Meet Eren Jaeger the Scout**

The warehouse door opened and Eren, crouching and accompanied by Jean was ready to start his mission with his team. Eren looked around, on the other side, Sniper was looking for a target to snipe on from the window...

Another window, Eren can see Spy was smoking his cigarette while Engineer ran past him to the sentry gun on the roof for defensive preparations...

On the ground, Pyro were standing while Soldier was juggling with his rockets...

After examining the battlefield carefully, Eren smiled, pumped his Scattergun and then charged along with the rest of his team to the capture point. Engineer's sentry gun fired bullets at Survey Corps but Eren was running too fast and that made bullets missed him...

Eren jumped from the roof to another building and now he was running toward the center of the map. Soldier and Pyro were running after him, Soldier fired rocket, missed him. Then suddenly a train came from nowhere crashed Soldier and Pyro, made both of them die. And before it will crashed Eren, he ran crossed the railway and toward to capture point...

Next we see the big sign saying "Meet Eren Jaeger the Scout", and Eren came walking into the scene. "Um... I don't even know where to start with you" Eren said quickly, sounded like lack of confident in himself. "I mean, do you even know who you're talkin' to?" Eren said...

In the next clip, we see Heavy was going to eat his Sandvich when someone poked his head with the baseball bat. When Heavy turned to see, he saw Eren, crouching on the top of a box. "Yo, what's up?" Eren said, greeting Heavy...

Back to the sign, Eren continued his speech. "D-Do you have _any idea_ , any idea who I am?" Eren said boastfully to the camera...

The next clip, showing Heavy was trying to punch Eren but he was too slow for his smaller and more agile opponent...

Back to sign, "Basically... Kind of a big deal!" Eren said to the camera. Then next, the clip showing him was trying to strangle heavy from behind with his baseball bat...

""Oh man, that's beautiful. Heh!" Eren said while looking at his own thin bicep and laughing, before the next clip, showing Heavy had Eren in a headlock. It look liked Heavy was going to win...

Back to the sign, "Ya' listenin'? Ok... Grass grows, birds fly, sun shines, and brotha... I hurt people!" Eren boasted to the camera and then another clip, "BOINK!" showing him hit Heavy's nuts with his baseball bat. "I'm a force a' nature!" Eren said as another clip, "BONK!" showing him hit Heavy in the chin with his same baseball bat...

"If _you_ were from where _I_ was from, you'd be fuckin' dead!" Eren said as another clip, showing Heavy collapsed on the ground, trying to reach his Sandvich while Eren was running up the side of the shipping container, jumped off and slamed his baseball bat into Heavy's head. "WOOO!" Eren shouted...

A final clip, showing Eren sat on the dead body of Heavy, eating Heavy's sandvich and now the capture point was Survey Corps's...

* * *

 **Second chapter in this serie and today is Eren's turn to be scout. Actually, I finished this long time ago and now I'm writing third chapter but I'm just not sure to post it. Anyway, review!**

 **Shingeki no Kyojin including character belonged to Hajime Isayama.**

 **Team Fortress 2 including character and items belonged to Valve Coporation.**

 **Also, I will give credit to Fil101 for inspired me to write this fanfic.**

 **Thank you and hope you like it!**


	3. Meet Armin Arlert the Engineer

**Meet Armin Arlert the Engineer**

Armin was sitting on his toolbox, calmly playing with his acoustic guitar. A blue truck right behind Armin, gunshots was everywhere around him but he didn't didn't care. He continued playing his acoustic guitar...

"Hey look buddy, I'm Armin Arlert the Engineer" Armin said as his hands still continued playing his acoustic guitar. "That means I solve problem" Armin added as a bullet came from nowhere but luckily, it didn't hit him...

"Not problems like 'What is beauty?' Because that would fall within the purview of your conundrums of philosophy" Armin said as another two bullets came but it still didn't hit him. "I solve practical problem" Armin said as he stopped playing guitar...

At the moment Armin grabbed a bottle from the box beside him and started to drink while some gunshots were heard around him and voice screamed in pain. As Armin put a bottle back on the box, the little counter shifted from 209 to 210, it meant the number of victims that his sentry guns killed. Armin then continued playing his acoustic guitar...

"For instance, how am I gonna stop some big mean motherhubbard from tearin' me a structurally superfluous new behind?" Armin asked to the camera...

Then the little sentry gun beside him beeped, aimed automatically at Sniper who was sniping on Armin from behind with his sniper rifle, and then it fired a few bullets at sniper, killed him...

"The answer..." Armin said as another sentry guns with two machine guns aimed automatically at another enemy and killed him. "...Use a gun... And if that don't work?" Armin added before another sentry gun, which this time with a rocket launcher, fired at another enemy. In this moment it turned out that Armin was surrounded by many sentry guns that were firing at enemies for him. "...Use more gun" Armin added.

Armin stopped playing his acoustic guitar to watch the rocket that fired by rocket launcher, blew up an enemy into little pieces, and smiled...

" _My arm!_ " Scout scremed in pain, and then his hand landed beside Armin and the little sentry gun automatically pointed at it. Armin just didn't care about it and continued playing his acoustic guitar...

"Like this heavy caliber tripod-mounted little ol' number designed by me..." Armin said before kick Scout's hand away from him, made the little sentry gun followed it and shot at it. "...Built by me..." Armin added before the same sentry gun automatically at another enemy and killed him. "And you best hope..." Armin said before stop playing his acoustic guitar and looking at the camera with serious face. "...Not pointed at YOU"

And so Armin continued playing his acoustic guitar in the middle of battlefield with his sentry guns killed all Blu team members that coming his way to kill him. Demoman, Sniper, Heavy and Spy were already dead in front of him while Pyro and Soldier trying to kill him but they were only to suffer the same fate. More of Blu team members coming on his way and died...

* * *

 **Another chapter for this fanfic serie and it is Armin's turn to be Engineer, if you want to know why he was chosen as Engineer. Simple answer, because he is very smart. But you already know that this fanfic inspired by** **Titan Fortress 2 by Fil101 in Deviantart. So who is the next that I will write? Follow this if you want to know and don't forget to review too! Thank you!**

 **Shingeki no Kyojin including characted belonged to Hajime Isayama.**

 **Team Fortress 2 including character and items belonged to Valve Coporation.**

 **Also, I will give credit to Fil101 for inspired me to write this fanfic.**

 **Thank you and hope you like it!**


	4. Meet Mikasa Ackerman the Sniper

**Meet Mikasa Ackerman the Sniper**

The truck camper was rolling down on the road, inside it was Mikasa who was driving it by herself alone. Bobblehead doll standing on the control panel. " _Boom_... Headshot" Mikasa said as she poked the doll's head with her finger...

"Sniping's a good job, mate... It's challenging work, outta doors... I guarantee you'll not go hungry-" Mikasa said while driving her truck...

The next clip showed Mikasa was brushing her teeth in front of mirror and beside it were little pictures of Engineer, Heavy and Scout. Engineer and Scout pictures were crossed, that means Mikasa killed them already. Only Heavy that she still didn't kill...

"Cause at the end of the day, as long as there's two people left on the planet, someone is gonna want someone dead" Mikasa said...

Heavy was laughing happily as he was firing his minigun that killing Survey Corps but then Mikasa used her sniper rifle, aimed at Heavy's head, firing a great shot that killed heavy instantly. Also, the bullet that Mikasa fired bursted a Demoman's bottle of rum while he was drinking it. It made a piece of broken bottle buried into his left eye, Demoman screamed in pain as he fired his grenade launcher madly and aimlessly but in the end his own grenades bounced back to him and hit him in the head, knocking him out and blowing him into the pieces...

Then next, Mikasa was talking through the public phone. "Armin? Armin, I'm a... Not a crazed gun girl, Armin! I'm an assassin!" Mikasa said to Armin through the public phone as she waiting what Armin will say next. "Well, the difference being one is a job and the other's a mental sickness!"

Then we see Mikasa driving her truck camper again. "I'll be honest with you... My team... Does _not_ care for it"

The next clip, Mikasa climbing a tall tower and was in the situation that she must uses her sniper rifle to snipe Blu team members again...

"I think his mate saw me..." Mikasa said as sniping Blu team members before bullets were fired at her and forced her to duck down behind the ledge. "Yes, yes he did!" Mikasa said...

Time passed very fast as Mikasa remained in the enclosed room, sniping Blu team members through the little window, sipping her coffee slowly and accumulating jars what seemed to be pee as the hour passed and the sun made its whole circle around the sky...

"Feelings?" Mikasa said while stabbing Spy from behind and kiled him. "Look mate, you know who has a lot of feelings? Blokes that bludgeon their wife to death with a golf trophy. Professionals have standards"

"Be polite" Mikasa said as the clip showed her aiming at medic, fired a bullet and killed him. "Be efficient" Mikasa said as the next clip showed her fired a perfect headshot at Soldier and then Pyro.

"Have a plan to kill everyone you meet" Mikasa concluded while firing her sniper rifle more, more and more, concluding a shot at the camera...

Then Mikasa appeared again, talking through the same public phone, completely annoyed. "Armin... Armin p-... Put Eren on the phone!" Mikasa said...

* * *

 **Sorry for upload this chapter late but in this moment, I am so very busy with my homework and coming mid term test. So I hope you will understand me. In this chapter, it is Mikasa chapter and she was chose as Sniper. Do you know why? Cause she is very skillful just like Sniper. Also, she and Sniper both are rarely talk to each other. Their faces are serious all the time. I hope you will enjoy it and please review because I want to know what do you think about this fanfic. Thank you.**

 **Shingeki no Kyojin including character belonged to Hajime Isayama.**

 **Team Fortress 2 including character and items belonged to Valve Coporation.**

 **Also, credit is gone to Fil101 in deviantart for inspired me to write this fanfic.**

 **Thank you and hope you like it!**


	5. Meet Sasha Blouse the Heavy Weapon Girl

**Meet Sasha Blouse the Heavy Weapon Girl**

Sasha walked towards the camera, carrying the huge mini gun that was bigger than her size, then dropped it in the box and sat on the nearby chair...

"I am Sasha Blouse the Heavy Weapon Girl..." Sasha said "And this is my weapon" she added while gripping on the huge mini gun's handle. "He weighs one-hundred-fifty kilograms and fires two-hundred-dollar custom-tooled cartridges at ten thousand rounds per minute..." she added, then looked seriously at the camera. "It costs four-hundred thousand dollars to fire this weapon... _For twelve seconds_ " Sasha concluded...

In the next clip Sasha was filmed as she was laughing hard. In another clip she was examining her huge mini gun when she was suddenly horrified. "Oh, my god! Who touched Heavy?" she wondered. "All right..." she muttered while looking to her left. " _Who touched my gun?_ " Sasha yelled loudly and angrily...

In the next clip, Sasha looked somewhat sad. "Some people think they can outsmart me... Hmmph... Maybe..." Sasha said before sniffing as if about to cry. "Maybe..." Then Sasha suddenly looked seriously at the camera. "I have yet to meet one that can outsmart _bullet_ " she added while showing one of the big bullets that serves as ammunition for her mini gun...

After that, Sasha was in the battlefield while firing her mini gun and laughing manically as she killed Blu team members. "Cry some moooooooore!" she shouted at them while firing at them. Once they were all dead, she calmed down and laughed little more calmly. "Cry some more..." Sasha repeated happily.

* * *

 **Another week and another chapter in this fanfic serie. Today is Sasha's turn to be Heavy, you may don't understand why she is chosen to be Heavy. The reason is her name "Sasha" is also the name that Heavy called his mini gun. So that described why in this chapter, Sasha called her mini gun "Heavy". Anyway, please review and hope you like it.**

 **Shingeki no Kyojin including character belonged to Hajime Isayama.**

 **Team Fortress 2 including character and items belonged to Valve Coporation.**

 **Also, credit is gone to Fil101 in deviantart for inspired me to write this fanfic.**

 **Thank you and hope you like it!**


	6. Meet the Potato

**Meet the Potato**

A potato was in the cupboard beside three cans of soup, and Sasha's hungry growls were audible nearby...

"Yeah, there she is!" Scout's voice was heard, though the camera still never stopped focusing on a potato...

"You! Stop right where you are, that is an order!" Soldier's voice was heard, Sasha's hungry growls still kept growling. "She's getting away!" Soldier exclaimed. "Do not let her get to the cu..."

But Sasha opened the cupboard and picked a potato up anyway...

"D... Don't do it, girl!" Scout said. "Do. Not. Do it!" Soldier said, but it was too late...

"Om nom nom nom" Sasha's voice was heard, she was eating a potato...

"Oohhhhhhhhh, hell..." Soldier said...

"H.. H.. Hey, let's just calm down here!" Scout said. "You listening? J.. Just.. Oh God! Oh my god, oh my god, oh my go..." Scout's voice was stopped as Sasha's footsteps were heard gathering speed. A can of soup fell over, and the cupboard door opened slightly...

"Ahahahahaha!" Sasha laughed happily...

"My blood! S.. She punched out all my blood!" Scout's voice heard as his blood was spilling on the floor, then more thuds were heard next...

"Ow, ow ow ow ow! Ouch, ouch! Ahhh..." Soldier's voice heard, and the sound of broken bones was heard...

"You call that breaking my spine?" Soldier said. "You Survey Corps ladies wouldn't know how to break a spine if..." Then a loud crack was heard, the cupboard door closed and opened again. The floor was covered with blood and another one of the cans of soup fell over. "Aughhh! My spine!" Soldier screamed...

And the next thing, Sasha was calmly standing in the battlefield, holding potato in here left hand. "Nom nom nom" Sasha took another bite. "Nom nom... Mmmm... Nom" While Survey Corps and Blu team members were fighting each other around her...

* * *

 **In this moment, I am not busy. So I think that I may finish this fanfic by the next week but I'm not sure, everything can happens. Today is potato's turn, everyone who watches AoT know that Sasha likes to eat potato, just like Heavy that likes to eat sandvich and in this fanfic, Sasha is Heavy, so that's why I made this chapter. Anyway, hope you like it and please review!**

 **Shingeki no Kyojin including character belonged to Hajime Isayama.**

 **Team Fortress 2 including character and items belonged to Valve Coporation.**

 **Also, credit is gone to Fil101 in deviantart for inspired me to write this fanfic.**

 **Thank you and hope you like it!**

 **Have a Good Day, mates!**


	7. Meet Levi Ackerman the Spy

**Meet Levi Ackerman the Spy**

An alarm sounded at the Blu base. "Intruder alert! Survey Corps spy in the base!" the Administrator said through the computer and loudspeakers...

"A Survey Corps spy in the base?" Soldier in front of the computer said...

Soldier took his shotgun. "Protect the briefcase!" the Administrator said as Soldier hurried to the room where briefcase was kept. "We need to protect the briefcase!" he exclaimed...

"Yo! A lil' help here!?" A voice from the left side of him, so he turned his head. Seeing Scout was trying to break the reinforced door...

Soldier then quickly rushed to the Scout. "All right, all right, I've got it. Stand back, son" Soldier said as he pushed Scout out of his way and then looked at the numeric panel to input the password. "1, 1, 1 and... 1" Soldier said, inputting 1-1-1-1 as password...

"Let's go! Let's go!" A hurrying Scout urged Soldier...

Suddenly Heavy came running with his mini gun in the hands towards Scout and Soldier. "Incomiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing!" he shouted, crashing Scout and Soldier into the door, also breaking the reinforced door open. Scout and Soldier fell to the floor, now they were in the room. Heavy still screamed like mad, expecting to meet the enemy...

"Hey! It's still here!" Scout exclaimed as his right hand reached the desk and touched the briefcase on the table, finding it was still safe...

"Alright then" Heavy said as he calmed down, finding the briefcase was safe...

"Ahem! Gentlemen" A voice came from behind them, it was Spy, carrying Sniper's dead body on his shoulder...

"I see the briefcase is safe" Spy added as he walked further in...

"Safe and sound" Soldier said as he stood up from the floor...

"Yeah, it is!" Scout added...

"Tell me... Did anyone happen to kill a Survey Corps spy on the way here?" Spy asked, but he got no answer except a shrug from Scout. "No?... Then we still have a problem" Spy said, putting Sniper's dead body on the desk, with the knife on his back...

"And a knife" Spy added...

"Oooooh, big problem" Scout took the knife out of Sniper's dead body. "I've killed plenty of spies; they're dime-a-dozen back-stabbing scumbags" Scout said while playing the knife. "Like you! Ow!... No offense" he added as he accidentally hurt himself with the knife...

"If you managed to kill them, I assure you, they were not like me" Spy said as he picked the knife up, handed it masterfully and gave it back to Scout. "...And nothing... Nothing like the man loose inside this building!"

"What are you? President of his fan club?" Scout asked sarcastically, Soldier laughed...

Spy turned around towards Scout. "No... That would be your mother!" he said s he threw sexual photos of Scout's mother on the table, in which she was with Levi, the Survey Corps spy...

"What the?... W-Wait! Ah..." shocked Scout said and then he was speechless...

"Indeed... And now he is here to fuck us!" Spy said. "So listen up, boy or pornography starring your mother will be the second worst thing that happens to you today"

Meanwhile Soldier and Heavy were looking at those pictures of Scout's mother...

"Gimme that!" Scout yelled angrily as he took the pictures from them...

Spy walked away, smoking his cigarette. "This spy has already breached our defense..." he explained, thinking of flashback where Levi was running, then hid behind the wall and spying his target, Engineer who was with his level 3 sentry gun. So Levi slid his sapper across the floor, it disarmed and then destroyed sentry gun immediately. "Sentry down!" Engineer said as he tried to grab his pistol but it was too late. Levi shot him in the head at the point-blank range...

"You've seen what he's done to our colleagues!" Spy exclaimed while looking at Sniper's dead body on the table. Then flashback showed Sniper, sniping from the attic when Levi came from behind. Sniper turned around and attempted to aim at Levi but Levi was too close already and kicked Sniper in the chest, sending him against the wood-planked window and broke wooden planks. Sniper then took his machete and tried to slash at Levi but Levi dodged deftly and then he slash Sniper's left cheek, made a scar on it. Sniper slashed at Levi again but in the end, Levi killed him by backstabbing him...

"And the worst of all, he could be any one of us..." Spy said, another flashback showed Medic, trying to fight Levi. "Raus, raus!" Medic said, trying to slash at Levi with his bonesaw but Levi protected himself with his right arm, then broke Medic's left arm, disarming him too. After that Levi disguised as Medic but without glasses, made Medic shocked. "Nein..." Medic said and then his neck was chopped by Levi, knocking his glasses off which Levi caught and wore it, completing his disguise...

"He could be in this very room!" Spy exclaimed. "He could be you! He could be me! He could even be-"

Before Spy would finish his sentence, Soldier blew his head with his shotgun and killed him immediately...

"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" scared Scout screamed...

"Oh..." shocked Heavy said...

"What? It was obvious!" Soldier said as he pumped his shotgun. "He's the Survey Corps spy! Watch, he'll turn red any second now..."

Soldier, Scout and Heavy waited but nothing happened...

"Any second now..." Soldier said as he poke Spy's dead body with his shotgun...

"See? Red! Oh, wait... that's blood" disappointed Soldier said, now it was clear that he was wrong. By this moment, Scout slowly walked towards unsuspecting Soldier and Heavy from behind, suddenly Scout manipulated the knife that killed Sniper as if it were his...

"So we still got problem..." disappointed Heavy said...

"Big problem..." Soldier said in agreement with Heavy. "All right, who's ready to go find this spy?"

By that time, it turned out Scout wasn't real Scout, but it was Levi all along, completing with his fake smile. "Right behind you" Levi said before brutally killed his two victims...

Once he was finished, Levi looked the picture of himself with Scout's mother, pushing most of them away and picked up only one. He smiled fondly while looking at it. "Ahh... ma petit chou-fleur" Levi said before put that photo into his pocket and getting away with the intelligence he came to steal...

* * *

 **What's up, guys? Yeah, I know it's been a year now since Meet the Potato and I believe some people thought I didn't wanna continue this anymore... Wrong! I'm here! I'm still alive! I was just busy with my life but don't worry, I will continue this fanfic and maybe write new fanfic. Just stay tune and have a good day, guys!**


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